White Lie
by ArielleM
Summary: Yes, I lied. But I'm not a bad person, honestly! It's just those six words kept ringing in my head, plus how am I supposed to think straight with Wood's abs right in front of me?


It all started 3 weeks ago—or around that time, I guess. I'm not really good with keeping track of these things. I _do_ know that it was about a year after The War ended, though. I was still getting used to dumping my Muggle disguise, using magic, and wearing my natural hair colour. During The War, I went completely Muggle.

I should probably start by telling you my name before you call the authorities and chuck me in the local loony bin.

My name is Penelope Clearwater. Everyone that knows me just calls me Pen, and, if you have the irresistible desire to go formal, you can call me Fountain Pen.

I've always wanted to be a writer ever since I was a little girl. I had a habit of selling my short stories to relatives for chewing gum because they were too cheap to give me actual money. Apparently five cents is too much to ask for a short story.

However, I'm officially finished with my first novel (!) right now and until a publisher decides to even consider it, I'm stuck working as a librarian at the Muggle public library whilst simultaneously working my way through my last year of Uni where I major in journalism.

Anyway, I saw his back first.

Audrey and I called him the Hunky Back Boy—we agreed that any guy with that broad of shoulders and muscular arms must have a cute face to match.

Yes, I am aware that that's very embarrassing and childish! _Moving on._

Unfortunately, I wasn't the first to see his face. I was sorting books in the back. Audrey was the first, actually. She said it was hot, but she also thinks my ex-boyfriend is cute. Don't blame me if I don't exactly trust her judgment!

Speaking of my ex-boyfriend, you should probably know that his name just so happens to be Percy Weasley. (Oh, don't act like you don't know who he is.) He's not an arse, but he tries so hard to be one. Sometimes it's hard to tell. But he keeps me out of Azkaban (for illegal side along apparition), and I repay him by letting him borrow stuff.

And by borrow I mean never see it again.

I'll have to get him to date Audrey—my Muggle coworker. She's a sweet girl, and you can't bore her with any topic except the care and feeding of cats (don't ask). That way he can borrow her stuff, and my books will stop disappearing.

"Hey Penny," said Percy. I tried to ignore him.

I was attempting to work on the Tuesday crossword, but having your ex-boyfriend wander around your work can be a bit distracting, especially when he's wandering a bit too close to Hunky Back Boy.

"Can I ask a favor?"

He's just going to keep bothering me if I don't respond.

I sighed.

"Sure, if you can help me guess what a six letter word for 'polluted beyond comprehension' is." I said. I didn't even bother to look up from my paper.

"Mexico," he said promptly. "Gulf to be exact."

"It's Linfin, China," Audrey's voice chimed from employee's rec room.

I scribbled that on the paper and looked up at the awkward ginger swaying back and forth on his heels.

"What would you like, Percy?"

"A date," he said.

"Percy," I said, sighing. "I thought we went over this. We're too different people. It would never work. I'm a writer, you like being tied down by politics, I watch Dr. Who—"

"I meant someone else," said Percy, sounding exasperated.

"Oh, who?" I asked, now thoroughly embarrassed. I just turned down a guy that didn't want to ask me out.

And _you _thought that only happened in the movies.

"Audrey Pitts," he said, turning a shade of red that matched his hair. Oh, that's so cute! They'd be the perfect couple! Percy loves work, and Audrey's a quiet girl who's looking for a serious relationship!

Match made in heaven.

I smiled. (If you were wondering, yes, I was still bright red). "Oh, Percy, that's great!"

"Well she seems like a nice girl," said Percy awkwardly. "So, what can you tell me about her?"

"Well, she has a cat named Wilbur after the pig from that book, "Charlotte's Web.""

"I'm sorry," said Percy, sounding confused. "I can't have heard you right. She named her _cat_ after a _pig_?"

"Yes," I said. ""Charlotte's Web" is a very good book."

"Anything else? Like whether or not there's a room with her name on it in an insane ward."

It was now my turn to roll my eyes. "She lives with her roommate, Leslie, and majors in biology at the same Uni I go to."

"Biology?" Percy asked, confused.

"Look it up. Anyway, you two should go out." Percy looked doubtful (I think he was still concentrating on the Wilbur thing). "Ok," I said, using my last resort, "I wasn't going to say this… but I think she likes you."

This changed his outlook instantly.

"Ok," he said, straightening his jacket. "Let's do this…before I lose my nerve and puke."

Thank you, Relationship Gods!

"She goes on break for lunch at noon, but we always leave a half an hour early."

_Same time Hunky Back Boy comes around_. _This is brilliant, I'm brilliant_.

With Audrey and Percy gone I could finally (just maybe) pluck up the courage to say hi to the guy.

Oh, whom am I kidding?

The truth is, I'm a little spineless when it comes to things like romance. My best friend/roommate, Athena, is the total opposite of me. For one, she's studying to become a video game designer and has a dog, Einstein, who's nuts—in contrast to my golden lab, Piper, who's addicted to tennis balls—and she can walk up to any guy anywhere and talk to him without a problem… if she wasn't dating Alexander.

I, on the other hand, have had one serious boyfriend, one jerk boyfriend, and several one-time dates.

Technically, I'm hopeless.

I was reading the paper and trying to figure out what the hell China was going to do about its pollution problem. Nothing, apparently (gits). And don't get me _started_ on Japan and the dolphins or the treatment of animals in fast food restaurants.

Just in case you didn't realize earlier, I'm a big animal activist.

I looked up from my paper just in time to see Hunky Back Boy walk through. I looked down quickly so he didn't think I was staring.

Crap, I missed his face again.

Damn brain.

"Hey, obsessive stalker," said a voice in my ear. I jumped about a mile into the air. Athena dissolved into giggles.

"I hate you," I said as I tried to regain my dignity (which is not the easiest thing to do, seeing as I have little).

"Relax," she said, waving her hand. "He didn't see you jump 600 miles into the air. Now, do you have those pudding cups in the employee fridge?"

"Help yourself."

"Aren't you going to go and talk to him?" asked Athena five seconds later as she dug into her pudding. "I mean, you got rid of Audrey and Percy and all you're going to do is stand here? You're a nut. I rest my case."

"Thank you for being so supportive," I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes.

"I don't do supportive. I do realistic."

"It's kind of hard to take you seriously when your face is covered with chocolate pudding like a five year old."

"Oh, shit," Athena whispered as she wiped her face on her sleeve.

"I take that back, the five year olds from story time have better manners. You do realize we have napkins?"

"My blouse is black. Now, back to your problems: Are you going to go to talk to him or not?"

"How do I do that without looking stupid?" I asked, feeling wary. Athena Greengrass' schemes normally get me in trouble.

Or I end up looking like a complete idiot. Same difference, really.

"Simple," Athena said, attacking a second, creamy white pudding cup. "By the way, your vanilla sucks eggs."

"Just tell me how to do this," I said loudly, gaining me a look from another librarian. "Plus, how can you say that about your pudding? You're eating it!"

"Easy," Athena said, ignoring my pudding comment. "You simply take that little cart of yours and_ pretend_ you're organizing books."

Wow. I'm really stupid. "You're right. It's so easy! Why didn't I think of it?"

"It's because you only think of two things: Hunky Back Boy, and your writing. You're hopeless when it comes to romance," she replied matter-of-factly. "Now go talk to him."

Little did I know our mission wasn't going to go as smoothly as we planned. Well actually I really should have guessed it would have landed in disaster.

It started out fine. I was pretending to put away books while Athena was following me in the aisle. No offense to her or anything, but she's _really _bad at eavesdropping. Don't tell her I said that.

He was in the K section, which contains two of my favorite authors. I took it as a sign. (Note to self: don't listen to the signs).

Everything was going great until I tripped.

Before we go on I should tell you that I'm really klutzy. I'm tripping over things on a day-to-day basis, even if most of those things are Athena's shoes that she _doesn't put away_.

Ahem! That's off-topic.

Here's the embarrassing part: I tripped over _nothing_. I wasn't even wearing heels! I was only wearing my ratty old sneakers!

Anyway, when I fell I thought I was going to hit my head on the cart, which would result in excruciating pain, seeing as it's metal. So my big fat mouth opened itself up and spoke without consulting my brain. It said—and I quote—"Jesus Christ bananas!" right before I hit the filthy floor.

JESUS. CHRIST. BANANAS.

I finally get a chance to talk to Hunky Back Boy, and the first thing I say is so incredibly stupid that I doubt even Peeves the Poltergeist would have used it_._

It's weird how I have a giant vocabulary of words and a nice size vocabulary of swears, and the first thing that comes out is "Jesus Christ bananas."

I hate my mouth. And my life. And while I'm here I would just like to add that I hate my job.

Hunky Back Boy looked over, saw me on the floor, and walked over to give a hand. It was very nice of him and all, but I was thinking something along the lines of '_this carpet is filthy_.'

"Need some help?" He asked with a look of amusement of his face.

Audrey was right. He is smokin'.

This is a miracle. Maybe the world doesn't hate me after all!

Hmm…his face was slightly recognizable, which was strange.

I thought about saying something sexy like Athena would have done, but then I realized my surroundings and what just came spurting out of my mouth.

"Yeah, thanks." Not the stroke of a genius I will admit, but at least it's not '_Jesus Christ bananas_.'

He offered me his hand, which I gladly took, and pulled myself to my feet.

"Hi," he said in what I noticed to be a very strong and _very_ sexy Scottish accent. Damn it, I know this guy!

I knew it was a bad idea to go Muggle. I lost all contact with the wizarding world and the final battle was no school reunion.

Incidentally, it was more of a family reunion for Athena, but seeing as her whole family are Death Eaters, she was busy trying to curse them rather than exchange pleasantries.

"Hi," I said hesitantly.

"Would you like some oranges to go with those bananas?" he asked with a smile. I turned bright red and looked down.

"Very funny," I said sarcastically, trying not to smile.

"I thought so too," he said with a smirk.

Oh my goodness.

Sexy Scottish accent, bad jokes that only I find funny and cute. I definitely know this guy.

"Do I know you?" he asked. "Because you look awfully familiar."

Well, I kind of work at the library you've been coming to. "I'm Pen. What's your name?"

"Wait—is your last name isn't Clearwater?"

"Yeah, it is. How did you know?" I hope he doesn't make me try to guess his name, 'cause I have no clue what it is.

"Penelope Clearwater." Cute Boy remembers me? Shit, he _is_ making me guess his name.

I really wanted to find those little elves that are running (and ruining) the memory part of my brain and hit them_ very_ hard until I could remember the guy's name. I bet those elves are having coffee and donuts, the kind with chocolate pudding.

Wait, what am I thinking about? THERE ARE NO LITTLE ELVES!

Athena's right. I am a basket case.

"You do look familiar," I said, "but how about refreshing my memory?"

"Pen, it's me!" he said in disbelief. "We had Potions together for 7 years!" The only thing I remember about Potions was the awful teacher, Snape, and Athena arguing with her partner so much that people were considering calling Potions "Athena vs. whatever poor bloke who has the misfortune to be stuck with her."

"Still blank." I considering lying and saying that I had had amnesia.

"Oliver Wood," he said, sounding a little annoyed. "Gryffindor Quidditch captain. I played Keeper. Does that ring a bell?"

Holy crap. Cute boy is Oliver Wood?

_Obviously, dimwit._

Shut up, elves.

"Wood," I smiled. I hoped it didn't look like a grimace. "Great to see you again. Last I saw you we were dodging hexes in the War."

"So… you work here?" He waved his arm around to indicate the library.

"Technically. What about you?"

"You are looking at Puddlemere United's MVP and Keeper," he said proudly. Note to elves: find out where in the league Puddlemere is. "What have you done with your life?"

I know he probably didn't mean it the way he said it, but right when he asked, "What have you done with your life?" my life flashed before my eyes. I mean, what have I done? My one book is still on my computer, I haven't graduated Uni yet, I work as a librarian—which includes reading to five year olds—and I don't have a boyfriend. At this rate, I'll end up as an old woman who's still too scared to try to publish her one book. So I did something really stupid.

I lied. 


End file.
